The Lost Passion
Let me catch a breath first.
...
This is somehow the first time I began to write since the last time I wrote something in my blogspot. I am arousing sadness for the empty posts. I feel a big guilty of being preoccupied with the lost routines I have for the last few years...
I adore words and I love playing with words. I love books and I love the curiosity that keeps me hunger to have more and more.This was, and frankly is still my passion. But There I go, lately I find it really fun socializing with people. I yield random thoughts I couldn't put into words. And this is something pathetic. I am lost in my own world and couldn't go back on my stand. Some of friends I have, before I went to Turkey they reminded me to keep writing. They wanted me to produce something, and I have failed fulfilled their longing.
To be or not to be. I am an almost failed writer, yes. There was a moment when I stand by my feet, looked around and I saw people with their own talent. Something they have based on their passion and the effort. The effort. The effort. I realized I have gone too far, looking for my interest, doing something new and finding a complete me. But I forget where I was supposed to be. I grasped my own hand and started to realize I have been walking on a wrong path. Well, maybe not that wrong but something was going wrong. That something, little something I have been missing and denying myself. My passion to be a writer and to publish a book.
These 3 days I spent quite a lot of time to read some people's blogs. Funny, I started to adore their writings, mostly because of the commitments that they have successfully put into their writing routines. I am drowned and jealous at the same time. If I have feet to run, why can't I run, I thought? that's a confusement I find accompanying me every second. If I have the interest to write, so why don't I write?
Two days ago I told one of my bestfriends that I am working on a book of mine and I hope I'm serious about it. I love her advice, the first step is always be the hardest. So I'm betting myself that I have to start. I made a new account as the sign of my re-born soul in the sense of writing.
I hope everything is going well. I hate and love uncertainity, the sense of adventure yet I can never be sure the end of my journey.